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Genki Sanban: Now, Betty. You know better than to call me "Mrs. Sanban". You will address me as "Head of Accounting Mrs. Sanban".
Numbuh 3: Hey, Numbuh 2!
Mushi Sanban: Hoagie!
Numbuh 2: Aw. Hey, Mushi.
Kani Sanban: Girls, enough bickering!
Lydia Gilligan: Hey! What's with all the racket?! Where's my phone? I've been waiting for hours.
Betty Gilligan: Ooh! This is my mother, Lydia. Oop. She's going to join us for dinner since I, um... I can't get her to leave.
Genki Sanban: How do you do!?
Lydia Gilligan: HOW DO I DO!? WHAT, WHAT ARE YOU, A COP!?
[Betty chuckles nervously]
Betty Gilligan: THOMAS, GET DOWN HERE!
Tommy Gilligan: I eat alone and for I am, THE TOMMY!!
[Thunder roars]
Lydia Gilligan: GET DOWN HERE NOW!!!!!
Tommy Gilligan: [scared] Okay, grandma, Okay!
Mushi: May I have a turn with your Posh Party Rainbow Monkey, sister?
Numbuh 3: Maybe later, Mushi. I think my head needs some Rainbow Monkey love.
Rainbow Monkey: Ah!
Mushi: Okay! I'll wait my turn.
Kani: That's it! I've had enough of your constant squabbling over that ridiculous Rainbow Monkey! "Rainbow Monkey" this, "Rainbow Monkey" that! I rue the day your mover ever bought that you that infernal toy and shattered the tranquility of our happy home!
Genki: Now, Kani. Give them a chance to play with their toy. A chance I never had as a child. Oh, what I would've done for a dolly. (sobs)
[lights are shutting off, Numbuh 3 screamed]
Numbuh 3: Huh!? Posh Party Rainbow Monkey!? Where did it go!? It can't be gone! It can't! Where is it!? Where is it!?
Mushi Sanban: (shrieks)
Kani Sanban: WHAT DID I SAY?! I AM SICK OF THAT CONSTANT BICKERING!!!
Lydia: I told you I should've taken that doll!
Numbuh 3: (screams as she bursts into tears)
Betty: Oh, don't tell me you're a vegetarian or something. I mean, it's just a turkey. (screams as she opens the lid revealing to be a Rainbow Monkey killed) I'm so fired.
Lydia: Fired, shmired. Where's the turkey? I'm starvin' over here!
Mushi: How can we talk about food at a time like this?!
(Numbuh 3 is still crying and crying)
Numbuh 2: THAT'S ENOUGH!!! Somebody here is guilty of Rainbow Monkey murder, and no one's leaving... (house goes into lockdown) ...until I discover who it is.
(Betty is quivering in fear.)
Numbuh 3: Well, don't look at me! I didn't do it.
Numbuh 2: Or DID you? (Numbuh 3 screeches angrily) (chuckles nevously) Right. Sorry.
Kani Sanban: Now. Look here, boy--
Numbuh 2: SIT DOWN!!!
Tommy: I WAS HUNGRY AND THIRSTY!!!
Lydia: Can we please get on with this stupid dolly investigation? I'm hungry here!
Numbuh 2: Hungry for revenge?!
Lydia: No! Hungry for turkey, you crazy munchkin! So I want some dinner!
Numbuh 2: Well, I want some justice. Justice with a nice helping of confession on the side. Any one of you could've done the deed.
Genki Sanban: I bought that doll for my daughters. It's theirs to do with as they please, but did anyone offer ME a turn with it? [Voice becomes as high as Kuki's] A hug? 5 minutes of Rainbow Monkey Fun?! NOOOOO! Not ONE LITTLE BITTY, HUGGY, WUGGY - EEEG! Phew! [she fixes her hair before resuming and talking in her normal tone] But I didn't do it. I was powdering my nose.
Numbuh 2: I know YOU didn't do it. The REAL culprit is... Mushi!
Mushi: You're kidding, right?
Numbuh 2: I don't kid. Sometimes I say cool jokes and puns and stuff, but never kid.
Mushi: But why would I do it? Kuki said she was gonna share the doll with me anyway!
Numbuh 2: Maybe, but perhaps you couldn't wait. I mean the Posh-Party Rainbow Monkey is pretty special. Special enough to grab from your sister with the lights when out, special enough to hug it ALL by yourself. When you forgot something, the Posh-Party Rainbow Monkey comes to care and share-sighing action. And the second you hugged, the Rainbow Monkey tried to let out a big sight. And that's when you realize the only way to save yourself to slience it, for good! And then you hit the poor rainbow monkey, hoping nobody would fight.
Mushi Sanban: I wouldn't do such a horrible thing. I love Rainbow Monkeys. I love sharing.
Numbuh 2: Then perhaps you share your fork with me.
Mushi Sanban: Uh, sure. (chuckles) I'm... Huh? (Everyone sees her fork is missing.)
Numbuh 3: Oh, Mushi! Why!?!
Mushi: Because you kept HOGGING IT! And showing off its hug-a-day-ciousness, AND DROVE ME NUTS!!!
Numbuh 3: Oh, Mushi. I should've shared more.
Mushi: Shared? You don't get it, do you? I WANTED IT ALL TO MYSELF! (laughing evilly)
Numbuh 2: Mr. Sanban, take her away. I have a feeling Mushi's going to be grounded for a long, long time.
Mushi: I'M INNOCENT, I TELL YA! GET ME A LAWYER! I KNOW MY RIGHTS! OOH, I'LL GET YOU, HOAGIE GILLIGAN JR.!!!
Genki Sanban: Thank you, for our most interesting evening. But I think we'll just go get ourselves some pizza tonight.